Friday, January 12, 2007

Give me a break, Jake Linzinmeir

This month's Bon Appetit sports a feature entitled "Snow Day" spotlighting Telluride chef Jake Linzinmeir's "tiny kitchen." Of course, I read this menu for 8, which featured lobster pot pies in incredibly cute little mini-dutch ovens, with great interest. In a little sidebar box "Small Kitchen, Big Ideas" they say,
When you see Jake's tiny kitchen (left) it's hard to believe that this entire menu was made in such a small space. "The smaller, the better," he says. "Too much space breeds disorganization. If the room is too big you lose the intimacy of what's happening in the kitchen." The centerpiece of the room is a black La Cornue stove that Jake bought from the original importer..."
That brought me to a sputtering stop. A La Cornue stove????

Okay, I have a few comments. First of all, I see five people standing in his kitchen. Jake, your kitchen is not tiny. The first page of the feature shows a lovely wooden table that apparently seats 8. Jake, your kitchen is not tiny. Jake has a La Cornue Chateau 165 ('only slightly less impressive than the Chateau 180') stove. JAKE, YOUR KITCHEN IS NOT TINY.

Plus, even if your kitchen were tiny, making pot pies, polenta squares, a salad and some port poached pears for eight people is not, in point of fact, a big freakin' deal.

I'll admit, straight up, that total jealously is involved. I want a La Cornue stove. It's not going to happen. First of all, there's no way anyone could get a La Cornue stove up the stairs to our apartment much less through our door. And even if they could magically get it into our kitchen "space" it would probably break through the floor and crush the occupants below us.

Now some of you may say, "But how do you know that Jake has a La Cornue Chateau 165 ('only slightly less impressive than the Chateau 180')?"

I know. I've been looking at these ovens for a good long while. I know.

Jake .. Jake, m'boy...your kitchen is not tiny.

Now, OUR kitchen is tiny.


cindym said...

Awww! i'd rather eat in your kitchen any day.

we could sit on top of your new giant la cornue stove.

Remember what i told you though -the one we had in cooking school was a pain in the ass! but it did have style in spades...

Marc said...

M.E. You crack me up! Jake's got nothing on you, babe. Maybe he's compromised and now doesn't have a fridge or a sink or drain board or a spot for the kitty... Sure, he's got his La Cornue, but what if that's ALL he has? Poor Jake.

ME said...

LOL, Thanks guys!

Cindy, I know, you're probably right... I should just let go of that La Cornue thing I have -- but I have a total mammalian "Ooooh, pretty shiny thing...." response every time I see one. Sigh.

And Marc, that gave me food for thought. What if Jake has no kitty perch? Now that would be tragic. You're right, Jake has my total sympathy.

Anonymous said...

not that it matters but I actually know Jake and have seen the kitchen. it takes up half of a 400 sq ft condo. Not picking an argument, and totally agree that the stove is fantastic but just adding my $.02

ME said...

LOL -- I've no doubt that Jake's kitchen is smaller than the average Bon Appetit facility (though 200 square feet sounds wonderfully spacious to me, as our kitchen is one of those great San Francisco efficiencies that measures 11 ft by 7 ft.) Like I said though, it's really jealousy that motivates-- if I could I'd shoehorn the La Cornue stove into our efficiency and just sleep on top of it. Thanks for giving me the inside info though. If you see Jake, please tell him I think his little mini dutch ovens rock!

Anonymous said...

I don't give a crap how large or small Jake's kitchen is! He can make me a butter poached steak any friggin' day of the week.